March 8, 2017 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to … Questions that Can Actually Help You Learn from and Build Upon Professional Experiences.

We all have the ability to learn and grow from all of our life experiences. With time and practice, we can become skilled at applying what we have learned to help us better navigate both our personal and professional lives. Here are seven simple yet effective questions to help you build upon your experiences, understand which things NOT to do or pursue and discover ways to do what you love.

1. What was your worst job?

Sometimes knowing what you DON’T like is more valuable than knowing what you think you do like - because it tells you what type of people to avoid and what roles to never pursue again.

When I was 16 I worked at a small ladies boutique in Center City, Philadelphia. They paid minimum wage plus 3% commission. I was offered the job after serving as a host/model for Philadelphia magazine’s “Best of Philly” events and parties on behalf of the store.

One Saturday I came into work expecting to find my $300 commission check but instead was greeted by a 3 x 5 index card that said: “Effective immediately sales associates will no longer receive commissions.” As I read that sign, I thought I could have a confrontational argument with the owners OR take those leather pants I had been eyeing for months, lock up the store and bounce. I did the latter and never looked back. The owners showed me who they were by breaking their promise and not keeping their word and I never gave them a chance to do the same thing to me again.

2. What was your favorite job?

Focus on the specific aspects of the job that you loved i.e., did you like the fact that you worked non-traditional hours, with creative people, or attended a lot of industry events.

I loved my years working with NIKE and the Jordan Brand, especially working with so many passionate business people, athletes and celebrities. I also loved my first job at AT&T and working overseas because of the autonomy and responsibility it offered. Since holding these positions, I have continued to seek out other opportunities that offer the same chances to do and work with the things I love.

3. What is the craziest thing that you’ve heard someone say during your career?

You can learn a lot from others mistakes if you pay careful attention to what people say in a group setting and how the decision makers respond or react.

When I worked as a freelancer, I attended a production meeting hosted by the prospective client. At the end of the meeting, the client opened the floor to questions. One young publicist asked, “what would I have to do to get fired? and what things will we not be able to get away with?”

Her question to the prospective client basically asked, “what is the least amount of effort I can give and still get paid.” Work ethics, integrity, and professional abilities aren’t just words but rather guides to help you present yourself and interact with others in a positive way.

Twenty years later I still shake my head every time I see someone verbalize and seek to strive for low expectations and doing the bare minimum.

4. What was some of the best advice that you’ve received throughout your career?

We have all been given great words of wisdom in our relationships, work and even our careers. However, do you know how to take advice from one aspect of your life and apply it to another life experience?

I once asked a prospective client what type of budget he had to work with. He replied, I want to pay you what YOU think you are worth. It taught me that people who feel valued will always give you 110% when/if needed, while those who feel that they are underpaid and over-worked will never go the extra mile with or for you. And, if they do – they will most likely resent you.

5. What are some of your professional accomplishments that make you feel proud?

We tend to be most proud of things that help/benefit others, create experiences, and do what others have not been able to achieve.

Executive producing and planning special events always makes me feel proud. It’s like conducting an orchestra with many moving people and parts. I’ve done hundreds of events, however, two events that will always stand out are - the Brand Jordan NBA All Star Party in Philly and securing the NYSE opening bell ceremony for iconic soul food restaurant Sylvia’s.

6. What is a professional risk you took that changed your life?

Career success is often a high-risk, high-reward world. Risks are tiny tests of our stamina, persistence and endurance. Practice taking small career-related risks every day so you’ll be prepared when opportunity presents itself.

Living and working outside of the country was something I did not embrace immediately. In fact, I passed up an international assignment in Asia before I accepted one working in Europe, The Middle East, and Africa.
When you live in another country where you don’t know a soul – you quickly learn how to become highly resourceful and independent, not to mention comfortable with yourself and doing things alone. Embrace chances to push yourself outside your comfort zone. Remember, no risk – no reward.

7. Who was your worst boss?

People who fail us are often our best life teachers.

I am lucky to say that I have only had ONE bad supervisor/boss. She would take credit for my efforts, not include me in key meetings, and gossiped about me and everyone in the department like a 12-year old girl. But what really made her a horrible boss was her lack of professionalism. Sure we don’t have to like everyone, but we have to always demonstrate respect and professionalism to those we work for and also those who work for us.

This week take a few minutes a day to ask yourself one question. Examine how the answer can help you move toward doing what you love.

November 9, 2016 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to . . . Things That Suck but That We Can’t Change (At the Moment)

Sometimes despite our best efforts things simply don’t work out, or happen or move as fast as we’d like. We all have to deal with difficult career-related things of which we have no control. Here are some suggestions to deal with some common challenges.

1. Getting passed over for a promotion: It doesn’t matter whether you’re a CEO or an entry-level worker, having to continue working for the same company after being turned down for a promotion doesn’t make anyone feel good. It sucks! However, don’t let this situation define you. If you believe you were qualified for the position, use this opportunity to “read the writing on the wall” and see why the decision makers may not be in your corner. Let this be the much needed motivation to dust off your resume and get moving on finding another job.

2. Needing to forego your dreams to deal with a personal or family situation: We all have responsibilities to other people. At times we need to put our dreams on hold to help those closest to us. If you are in a holding pattern, remind yourself that all dreams deferred don’t “dry up like a raisin in the sun” and die. Some can actually gain momentum and even gain greater intensity after time has passed. Use your waiting time to refocus on your own dreams and your career goals. Sometimes no, isn’t no forever, just “no” for right now.

3. You’re in over your head at work: Many times you may need to “act as if” in order to get a job or be considered for an opportunity. However, once you’ve gotten it, you may soon find that you aren’t able to do key aspects of the job or handle the pressure of the environment. Ask someone, preferably outside the organization, for help. I have helped many people navigate the first few months of a new job by ‘ghost-writing” key reports and presentations on their behalf. If you can’t find people or resources to provide you the needed support, consider creating a Plan B or, if needed, to bow out gracefully. Ideally, you should be the first to say that things aren’t working perfectly and to propose a “back up” plan. Identify someone (internally or externally) to assist you with the project or your job overall. Keep in mind that doing this runs the risk of losing your job. However, it’s far better to admit that you are unable to do something (well in advance of a deadline) or a few weeks or months in, than to drag out the inevitable and possibly destroy a professional bridge and your reputation in the process.

4. You can’t get out of a work rut: You try to pursue different positions at your current job or even work on new projects, but you simply can’t get out of your career rut. Find a way to break away and recharge your batteries. Visit a friend or family member in another city, take a “mental health day” off from work or, simply do little and low cost things to change your routine like get a Mani/Pedi or buy/download a new book. The best way to break a rut is to change the way you think, which in turn will affect your actions and the reactions they create.

5. Dealing with being unemployed: Do your best to keep yourself busy and your thoughts positive. As long as you are doing something every single day to change your employment status, be patient and creative with your time – things will happen. You might not be able to control when the job offers come but you certainly can take hold of how you creatively manage your time. Create a blog sharing your ups and downs of unemployment or showcasing your interest or hobby. Remember, in order to have something that you’ve never had, you often have to do things that you’ve never done.

6. They are planning to outsource or phase out your position: If you are currently working in an industry or department that you know in time will soon be downsized or eliminated entirely, start creating a plan for the future today. You may not be able to stop the axe from chopping your job but you should and can start exploring new opportunities for when, and not if, that occurs. I know many people who work in journalism and publishing who have successfully evolved and grown along with the industry – enabling them to not only stay employed but remain in demand.

7. You are still waiting for the temporary (or part-time) job that you were told would become permanent: Many opportunities start as short-term or temporary assignments but in time can become full-time jobs. If you are currently in this situation, and even if the date that you should have gotten your permanent title has long passed, keep giving 110%. You don’t want to lose steam and have someone make the decision to not to hire you when you lost your passion because things were taking longer than you would have liked.

Just because things have not happened, doesn’t mean they never will. The key is to have and exhibit the 3 Ps – patience, persistence and perseverance. Life and career are not always perfect and at times we all have phases or positions that are really tough – so hold on. This week remind yourself that you might not be able to change things today, but you can change your perspective and put things in place to be prepared when change happens.

September 28, 2016 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to . . . Finding Success Because of Your Mindset and Not Just Your Abilities

World-renowned Stanford University psychologist Carol Dweck has spent decades studying why it’s not just our abilities and talents that bring us success but whether we approach things with a “fixed” or “growth” mindset. Here are some key takeaways from her amazing book, Mindset, and seven questions to determine which mindset you currently have and ways to make changes to accomplish true career success.

1. What is your mindset on life?: Dweck says how you answer the following four true or false statements will tell you whether you have a growth or fixed mindset: (1) You are a certain kind of person, and there is not much that can be done to really change that; (2) No matter what kind of person you are, you can always change substantially; (3) You can do things differently, but the important parts of who you are can’t really be changed; and (4) You can always change basic things about the kind of person you are. Answering “true” to statements 1 and 3 are the fixed-mindset questions and questions 2 and 4 reflect a growth mindset.

2. Are you more concerned with how you’ll be judged or are you concerned with improving? The above questions relate to your personality mindset and reveal qualities dependability, cooperativeness, caring or social skills. Your goal in life should be about learning (a growth personality mindset) and not about caring how others assess your ability or trying to get everything “right” on the first or tenth try (a fixed personality mindset).

3. Do you want to change your mindset?: As a child, someone may have praised your intelligence, looks or ability. However, words alone don’t foster our self-esteem and enable us to accomplish things. In fact, being praised solely for your outcome can jeopardize your success. Redefine success to include the effort and process, and not just the end result. Remember you can be smart and talented but you need a growth mindset to cultivate the coping skills required for life.

4. Do you have the CEO disease? Dweck gives a great example in her book of the downside of a fixed mindset when it comes to business and your professional life. She talks about former Chrysler CEO Lee Iacocca who, after a period of initial success, kept bringing out the same car models again and again with only minor tweaks. Meanwhile Japanese companies were redefining how cars should look and run – and eventually led the market. Where in your professional life are refusing to welcome a challenge and finding new ways to approach things? Learn ways to embrace your shortcomings and thrive, not cower, after setbacks and “failure.”

5. Do you only like doing things that you know you’ll do well? If you are living your life thinking I have mastered “X” and therefore don’t need to continue learning more about it – STOP THAT TODAY.
The bigger the challenge the more we learn to “stretch” ourselves, something many great athletes have shown us from their example. Many sports greats often trained with people who were older, bigger, better and even more talented. It was challenging themselves in this way that helped them become a phenom.

6. Do you feel “smart” when you are “flawless” or when you are “learning?” I love the feeling of having that “aha” moment when I realize why that “thing” that I did wasn’t working – because now I know how to “fix it.” Do you feel the same way? Start embracing the power of the process of things and not just the energy of doing things “perfectly.” Perfection doesn’t invite progress and effortless success doesn’t teach us anything. Remember, change and progress is essential to success in our work and careers.

7. What are you trying to prove and who are you trying to prove it to? People with a fixed mindset opt for success over growth. Doing so begs the question, what are they really trying to prove? If you are living with a fixed mindset stop trying to prove that you are intelligent, unique or special – you are. Imperfections are not shameful it’s what makes us great.

“Failure is an action NOT an identity.” Everything you try will work out. Your inability to do something perfectly or instantly does not define who you are but rather opens the potential of who you can become. Things are not “either or” – you can have great ability but still need to embrace putting forth effort. Even if you are a genius be willing, as Dweck says, to “upgrade your genius.” This week think about whether you have a fixed or growth mindset. If it’s fixed, ask yourself – “At the end of your career do you want to look back and see that you only did those things in life that you knew you could succeed in – or do you want to say that you explored, tried to improve and enjoyed the journey and not just the destination?”

September 21, 2016 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to . . . Making Professional Friends.

When we are young we have many opportunities to meet and make friends. Going to school, joining a sports team or simply hanging out at the playground – offers us chances to connect with new people. Yet the older we get the harder it seems to make new friends. Whatever age you may be, we all need work friends to support us and help us navigate our careers. In fact, the older we get the more we need to surround ourselves with a strong support network. Here are seven ways to cultivate those relationships and reasons why we need them.

1. A Work BFF: Your best friend shares your interests and is that one person you can confide in no matter what. However, if your “bestie” works in a different field or industry they may not always be the ideal person to turn to when it comes to navigating your career. Take time to cultivate a close relationship with a peer at your workplace. It’s not just a good idea but a necessary asset to succeed at work. Having a work BFF offers a trusted confidant who understands exactly what challenges you may face, as well as someone who can help you best address and overcome them.

2. An Industry Insider: No matter what industry you work in, it’s really important to befriend someone at a different company who knows a lot of people in your field. Industry insiders offer a unique perspective and can be invaluable when it comes to finding and exploring new professional opportunities.

3. The Worker-Bee: Everyone needs people in “high” places to help them succeed, but we also need work friendships with people inside our organization who help us get things done. Pick up a coffee for the receptionist, treat the group admin to lunch, write a personal thank you note to the intern, or buy a $5 Starbucks for the “guys” in the mail room. Continue to cultivate these friendships over time. Years ago I worked with an admin who is now a senior vice president and executive producer at a major TV network! These friends will not only help ensure your package makes the last Fed-Ex pick up, but can also be unexpectedly invaluable sources of information. Often people treat the worker-bees as “invisible” and unknowingly spill the “tea” (i.e. company gossip) in front of them. The bottom line is you should treat everyone you encounter with respect, especially people who are often ignored and forgotten.

4. The Dear Abby: Years ago people wrote to a woman named Ann Landers who had a syndicated newspaper column called Dear Abby when they needed advice on how to deal with a certain problems and situations. Today, you need a professional friend who you can turn to for advice and ideas on how to deal with difficult people, places and things. Find a person who you admire and respect who you can turn to when you face work challenges.

5. A Kindred Spirit: Take advantage of the company office party or a committee project to meet colleagues who work in other departments or divisions. Follow up with people who you “click” with by sending a “nice to meet you email” or ask them out for lunch or coffee. Whether you share a similar sense of humor or style, create a professional friendship with like-minded co-workers in other areas of the company, especially those areas you might want to work in one day.

6. The Common Interest: Where you live, how you dress or where you went to college has nothing to do with who you are personally or professionally but using this information may be a great way to make new friends at work. If you notice a co-worker in the elevator holding a tote bag from your college alma mater or that you recognize from the neighborhood, reach out and introduce yourself. Shared interests can be a great foundation for professional friendships.

7. The Gatekeeper: Every office has a senior leader but every workplace has a gatekeeper who provides access to this top boss. Make an effort to “play nice” with the gatekeeper as he or she has the boss’ ear and the ability to make your life at work a smooth or rough process.

In life, we can all get by with a little help from our friends. The same is true when it comes to our careers. This week think about ways to enhance and expand your work and professional friendships. Remember, people are much more likely to recommend friends for promotions and new opportunities at other organizations - than people they don’t know.