April 19, 2017 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to – Where is Your Confidence?

Confidence is like a sense of humor, everyone thinks that they have it but less than 20% of people actually do. In fact, confidence is an essential ingredient for success in life and career.

The only way to know for sure if you have confidence is to test it. So here are seven questions to help you determine where your confidence really lies, as well as simple but crucial things you can do to boost your belief in yourself and what you can accomplish.

1. What professional accomplishment are you most proud of? 

Your ability to simply have an answer to this question is key to measuring your true confidence. If your accomplishment happened more than 5 years ago, you may be badly in need of a shot of confidence. Confident people can site accomplishments from last week, last month or last year. Stretch yourself to identify recent successes. They are critical to help you reinforce your potential of having other successes in the future.

2. What is the first thing that you can do to create positive change in your life and career?  

Did you say, “change myself or the way that I think?” If not, you should have. Confidence is intertwined with self-awareness and living in the present, not with arrogance and blaming of others. If you’re stuck on what you didn’t get as a child or all the things other people have done to you/your life and not on yourself – not only is your confidence lacking - your approach to advancing in life is all wrong. Today embrace this – focusing on what you don’t have or cannot do interferes with what you can. 

 
3. Do you think you can do anything you set your mind to?  

Whether you are right or wrong – simply thinking that you have the talent and skills to achieve your goals is 80% of doing so. Chances are you will not accomplish everything exactly as you imaged it but taking 10 minutes a day to visualize yourself achieving a goal will increase the potential for success. Learn how to “see” every goal having a positive outcome. It WILL help you believe it is possible.  


4. What is the last big risk you took and how did it work out?  

If your immediate reaction to this question is thinking whatever you tried was a huge failure, you need to embrace a new definition of failure and what it really means. Success in one endeavor often happens after “failure” in another. Failure is a necessary part of trying anything new. Just because something did not work out exactly as you planned – means just that – it didn’t work as planned. It does not mean that it or you are a failure. Things not working out teaches you how to make adjustments but is not a reflection of your talents, abilities and potential. Your ability to see opportunity regardless of outcome is critical to success. Boost this part of your confidence by practicing how to not take “no” personally.  

 
5. What is the biggest thing standing between you and your desired goals?  

Hopefully your answer is “time” or “money.” However, if your response was “waiting for the right opportunity to come along” - think again. Confident people create (not wait) for opportunities. If your confidence is at a 10 - you know that the only thing standing in between your dreams and goals – is you! Remind yourself daily that you are the only one who can connect yourself with the right people and situations to make your dreams a reality..  


6. What do you say to yourself to stay inspired and motivated?  

You should be able to site at least five things that have nothing to do with other people. Confident people are usually motivated by prior success and possibility. They also feel that they deserve (and therefore expect) greatness. Ask yourself this – if you can only motivate others but cannot do the same for yourself is that just a way of sidestepping the reality that you are lacking some much needed personal confidence?   

 
7. What is your biggest regret?  


 Idealy you live life believing that everything happens for a reason. Mistakes, setbacks and failed projects/relationships are not things to regret but rather things to learn from and make you a better person. Life is about taking chances and putting it all on the line – that way you know you have done all that you can do and there is nothing to regret. Embrace risks and seek to learn from every life and career experience – and remind yourself that nothing should be regretted.  



Honesty is the best policy when it comes to dealing with your strengths and weaknesses, and your confidence. This week take an honest and hard look at what you really believe you can do and achieve. It’s easy to say you have confidence but far more revealing to ask yourself these critical questions and take a hard look at the honest answers.  

March 15, 2017 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to . . . Common Communication Mistakes 80% of People Make.

It has been said that 80% of conflict is a communications issue. I recently had a minor conflict with a neighbor that was caused from her literal and figurative inability to hear and understand what I was saying. This morning I thought that when it comes to life in general most things that disconnect people have to do with what and how things are said. It may sound silly but we all need to brush up on key types of communications. Check out these seven questions to see how you score on professional communications.

1. How do you ask for a raise or promotion? The biggest mistake people make in not getting a raise or promotion is lacking confidence and being “mousey.” Would you want to give more money to someone who can’t look you in the eye, use a firm and clear voice and command your attention and respect? No, you wouldn’t - so why should your current boss or potential future employer.

2. How do you introduce yourself? Do you have a memorable way of meeting people? If not, you should. Tell others that you mean business with your initial conversation and your first impression. You’ll get brownie points for making social connections i.e., asking questions or using body language such as nodding your head and smiling. I introduce myself as a master problem solver.

3. How do you present information and yourself? Whether it’s an interview or a PowerPoint presentation, the best way to “communicate” your knowledge and ability is to be prepared, knowledgeable, and on time. Always communicate the W.I.F.M. factor (What’s in it for me?) and K.I.S.S. (Keep it Simple for Stupid). This is certainly not insulting anyone nor their intelligence but rather a great idiom to remind you to be clear and concise.

4. How do you deliver an apology or explanation? Chances are whatever bad news you have to deliver – it’s best to go with a sincere ‘less is more’ approach. I have seen many people talk themselves out of an apology by focusing on themselves and not the other party. If you say or do something that you wish you hadn’t – speak on and move on.
But before you do, remember that people want to be heard, so shut up and listen. Equally, learn how to find a positive spin in any negative. It softens the blow and makes people associate you with something good.

5. How do you ask others to do things? It’s not what you say by truly how you say things. Period. Tone, volume, and frequency affects others. Follow a good rule of thumb – listen twice as much as you speak.

6. How do you relate to co-workers on a personal level? Your goal is not to be the party-girl or after hours guy, but it is good to connect with select colleagues who share common interests. Find ways to strike up neutral topics such as hobbies, work background, and pop culture (minus the politics).

7. How do you express thanks and appreciation to others? Everyone achieves because of the help of others. Find ways to say more than a generic thanks to those who help you in big and small ways.
>Communicate in clear and concise ways. This week practice new ways to ask for things and express what you experience. In time, you will be a seasoned pro at minimizing a lack of communication or misunderstanding.

January 18, 2017 ASK PATRICE . . . When It Comes to Negotiating a Higher Salary, Even with Less Than 5-7 Years of Experience.

Each month we are going to feature a question from a Living on Purpose Project (LOPP) fan or follower and provide “straight no chaser” career advice from our CEO and Founder, Patrice Anderson. If you have a career-related question you’d like to ask, please comment on social media or directly email us atlivingonpurposeproject@gmail.com

“I have almost five years of experience, and less than two in my desired field. I have been offered a position at a mid-size company doing what I like but the salary is the same as my current position at a larger firm. How can I negotiate a higher salary?”

Negotiating is something I am lucky to have learned, literally from some of the best in the business. Here are secrets to asking for a higher salary and other forms of compensation. Following them will take your negotiation skills from shaky to successful in no time:

1. Wear your poker face: Letting others know what you’re thinking is the kiss of death when it comes to any negotiation. So don’t do it. Play it cool, and act as if you have MANY options and have done this before. Even if this is your first job offer in 2 years or you don’t have a clue about negotiation – act as if.

2. Six degrees of separation: Gather as much intelligence on the key players as you can. Who are the decision makers? How long have they been with the organization?
Know their successes and weaknesses, as well as who they have worked and gone to school with. Effective name dropping is effective. Create and start to cultivate a connection through shared associates and experiences. Your ultimate goal is to motivate them to believing that you are the candidate they MUST have.

3. Charm to disarm: My grandmother always told me – “you catch more bees with honey than you do with _ _ _ _.” Be pleasant and honest. People will know when you are overdoing it – so start with basic niceties like their appearance or a good point they made. Then move up to say and show the appropriate amount of deference and your respect. You can kill any deal simply by rude behavior and poor business etiquette

4. Demonstrate and prove others are being paid more: Talk in a non-threatening way about how the position you are considering is extremely similar or exact to another in the company/field/industry. A position that is paid at a higher salary. Something like “the positon you describe sounds more like (INSERT ONE LEVEL HIGHER) and detail all that you are being expected to do. Pay note to supervising even an intern. If it’s an assistant positon say it sounds like a “coordinator.” If they call it a manager say it sounds like a senior manager or director.

Your goal is to point to other people doing the same job for more money. If you need to build a better case – highlight that you know the previous person to hold that position had fewer responsibilities. And, to seal the deal offer to take on another project, area or department to clearly demonstrate the significant increase in job responsibilities – and to give them leeway to adjust the salary.

5. Highlight your negatives: After explaining your sincere interest and aptitude to do the job at hand – mention the “down side” for you. Will your commute time/expense double? Are you leaving a more well-known or prestigious brand or company? Share as they say, the “facts.”

Then remind them of what impressed them about you in the interview or prior meeting and share three (3) strong industry and/or career accomplishments. Reinforce this “negative” message with your desire to be a part of their team.

6. Ask rhetorical questions: People are more likely to be flexible and concede when they don’t feel confronted. Making your comments (and even reservations) into rhetorical questions is a great way to prevent things from going “left” (at best) or contentious (at worst).

Saying something like, “I really want the positon but I wish that there was some way I could not have the added expense of commuting?” or “The position is great but it really sounds much like an Account Executive, not a Coordinator, which I know has a much higher salary?

7. Be direct about the extras: Depending on the company, you should ask about signing bonus, performance based stock options, assistance with relocation or moving costs, and increased transportation. These pay outs may not come in lump sum, one-time payment but – money is money.

Everything in life is negotiable and everything in life requires some form of negotiation. Stop limiting your career options by lacking knowledge and experience in negotiating with people at all levels.

This week start by practicing some of these tips, reading more about the topic, and enlisting a friend to role-play the part of your future employer.

DJ Khaled - All I Do Is Win Feat. Ludacris, Rick Ross, Snoop Dogg & T-Pain from DAYO HAREWOOD on Vimeo.

December 28, 2016 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes To . . . Great Career Advice From a Dog.

I read a great quote about dogs that said that dogs are the only animal on the planet that love you more than they love themselves. Thought that was very powerful. Here are seven amazing professional lessons that my dog taught me about working with others.

1. Body language: 80% of most communication is actually non-verbal. So when in doubt “read” others to see if they are a threat to you. Observe everything – eye contact, stance, types of questions they ask (or lack thereof).

2. Solid business relationships are based on trust, loyalty, and respect: Associate with those who you can build, grind and hustle together.

3. Maintain clear boundaries and expectations give to others: Enough said!

4. Dog fights are ugly and intense but sometimes required: Some things are worth fighting for such as integrity, your professional worth, respect and what is rightfully yours. When your friends, family or your character is attacked turn fight with your words and actions.

5. Trust your instincts: Know when a person or situation seeks to harm or take advantage of you. You know when something does not look kosher, go the other way. Watch those showboating, lying or those saying things that just don’t add up. Hone your instincts by trusting that when you feel someone or something is not right in your gut – you’re probably right.

6. All dogs are different: Remember that everyone has a story that is deeper than the person who you see. Build relationships slowly and over time unpeel the layers of each person you encounter.

7. Learn new tricks: Despite your age or experience you can always hone and learn new ways to do things. Keep an open mind and you’ll find that there is something to be happy about daily. Share that happiness with others.

I have owned a dog since I was 7 years old and believe dogs will always be a part of my life. This week appreciate and reflect on the roles animals have played in teaching you some “human” life lessons. Or if you are not an animal person, try to appreciate and learn from them in other ways. Happy New Year!

December 21, 2016 Things To Think About When It Comes To . . . Looking for and Finding Inspiration And Opportunities in The Oddest Places

Yesterday I turned on the TV at 5:30 a.m. hoping to find something inspirational to kick start my day that would officially start in about an hour. I stumbled upon an interesting piece on Gloria Steinem on OWN and it brought back a great memory of when I met Gloria Steinem because of a hand-written card.

While working for NBC, I met Carole Black when she was the President and General Manager of the NBC owned station in Los Angeles NBC4. Soon after, I heard that she took a job in NYC as the new President and CEO of Lifetime Television. I sent her a short “congratulations way to go” note and got a call back from her assistant about a week later. The assistant passed along Carole’s thanks and a special invite for me to be Carole’s “plus 1” at an upcoming 65th birthday party for Gloria Steinem at Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas’ house! I guess CEO’s don’t get a lot of “congrats on your new gig and huge executive parachute plan” cards.

I will always remember so many things about that great night, such as the 39 other incredible guests and meeting and talking with a living legend. But what still amazes me is that this all happened because of a simple note.

Here are seven things that this unusual string of events in my life and a personal card and thank you note actually taught me about having a successful career.

1. At any moment, you can do something small to put a big opportunity into motion down the road.

2. Career success comes from cultivating professional and personal relationships. People want to work with people they know and like.

3. There are rich people, there are the wealthy people and there are people who are rich because how they have created, navigated and shared their life experiences. Everyone, including you, can be one, two, or hopefully all three.

4. Never underestimate the value of business and social etiquette (if you don’t know it – learn it quickly.) Always remember please and thank you are words that have tremendous power.

5. Celebrities and accomplished professionals in many ways are not like everyday people. However, every human being needs to hear that others are proud of who they are, as well as what they do.

6. Seize every moment to network and learn from people, especially those who you may never see again. I met many people and business associates that day who have impacted my career.

7. Always bring your host a gift or small token of your appreciation. I brought Gloria Steinem a book of poetry, and even bravely gave her an original work of my own. I also sent Carole Black one darn nice thank you note for inviting me and proving such as great networking opportunity.

Find inspiration to tackle a new venture by first simply reflecting on something you’ve previously done that worked out better than you imagined, then take your first step toward doing this new thing. This week take a moment to reflect on these lessons learned and consider who you could send a “personal note” that might directly or indirectly help you experience something great?

October 1, 2016 The Living on Purpose Career Readiness Challenge . . . 30 Days of Activities, 4 Surprising Posts, 1 Great Sidebar Post on Creating (and not waiting) for Opportunities and 1 Compelling Conversation.

It’s October 1, summer’s over and it’s back to your daily grind. You have exactly 93 days to either start off 2017 with a new job that you love or head into the New Year doing the same old thing. What will you choose? We hope that you are ready, willing and able to make a change and will join us on October 5 when we’ll launch the first Living On Purpose Project 30-Day Career Readiness Challenge. Whether you are looking to change industries, move up in your current career/position; or are planning to switch things up in the near future - this monthly event will help you break the cycle and take concrete steps towards your dream job.

Each week will focus on non-traditional ways to advance your level of career readiness, as well as daily activities that you can do (most in 7 minutes or less) to help practice and master a core key skill. Here’s a sneak peek of what we have planned:

October 5: Seven Surprising Ways to Get LinkedIn to Work for You
Two people join LinkedIn every second. Here are seven surprising ways that people are using LinkedIn as an interactive tool to find job leads, get the attention of recruiters and hiring managers and effectively promote themselves professionally.

October 12: Compelling Conversation with Rachel Piatczyc
Who says that you have to pick just one job or career that you love? This month we’re talking to Rachel Piatczyc who shares her secrets to creating a multi-faceted career. We’re also offering a sidebar post on October 16 about three ways to create and not wait for opportunities.

October 19: Seven Things You Never Imagined Could Help Get You Hired in a Hurry
Tired of sending your resume out with no response? Are you finding that all the traditional ways to find a new job are not working? We’re spilling the tea on seven surprising things that can help you land a job quickly.

October 26: Seven Ways Mind/Body Balance Can Help You Succeed (And Why It’s Not B.S!)
You’re young and healthy and might never believe that stress can be slowing you down and blocking you from the job of your dreams. Mind/Body Balance isn’t hippie, new age stuff, but a proven method to help you make a successful professional transition and sustain an effective long-term life and career.

September 21, 2016 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to . . . Making Professional Friends.

When we are young we have many opportunities to meet and make friends. Going to school, joining a sports team or simply hanging out at the playground – offers us chances to connect with new people. Yet the older we get the harder it seems to make new friends. Whatever age you may be, we all need work friends to support us and help us navigate our careers. In fact, the older we get the more we need to surround ourselves with a strong support network. Here are seven ways to cultivate those relationships and reasons why we need them.

1. A Work BFF: Your best friend shares your interests and is that one person you can confide in no matter what. However, if your “bestie” works in a different field or industry they may not always be the ideal person to turn to when it comes to navigating your career. Take time to cultivate a close relationship with a peer at your workplace. It’s not just a good idea but a necessary asset to succeed at work. Having a work BFF offers a trusted confidant who understands exactly what challenges you may face, as well as someone who can help you best address and overcome them.

2. An Industry Insider: No matter what industry you work in, it’s really important to befriend someone at a different company who knows a lot of people in your field. Industry insiders offer a unique perspective and can be invaluable when it comes to finding and exploring new professional opportunities.

3. The Worker-Bee: Everyone needs people in “high” places to help them succeed, but we also need work friendships with people inside our organization who help us get things done. Pick up a coffee for the receptionist, treat the group admin to lunch, write a personal thank you note to the intern, or buy a $5 Starbucks for the “guys” in the mail room. Continue to cultivate these friendships over time. Years ago I worked with an admin who is now a senior vice president and executive producer at a major TV network! These friends will not only help ensure your package makes the last Fed-Ex pick up, but can also be unexpectedly invaluable sources of information. Often people treat the worker-bees as “invisible” and unknowingly spill the “tea” (i.e. company gossip) in front of them. The bottom line is you should treat everyone you encounter with respect, especially people who are often ignored and forgotten.

4. The Dear Abby: Years ago people wrote to a woman named Ann Landers who had a syndicated newspaper column called Dear Abby when they needed advice on how to deal with a certain problems and situations. Today, you need a professional friend who you can turn to for advice and ideas on how to deal with difficult people, places and things. Find a person who you admire and respect who you can turn to when you face work challenges.

5. A Kindred Spirit: Take advantage of the company office party or a committee project to meet colleagues who work in other departments or divisions. Follow up with people who you “click” with by sending a “nice to meet you email” or ask them out for lunch or coffee. Whether you share a similar sense of humor or style, create a professional friendship with like-minded co-workers in other areas of the company, especially those areas you might want to work in one day.

6. The Common Interest: Where you live, how you dress or where you went to college has nothing to do with who you are personally or professionally but using this information may be a great way to make new friends at work. If you notice a co-worker in the elevator holding a tote bag from your college alma mater or that you recognize from the neighborhood, reach out and introduce yourself. Shared interests can be a great foundation for professional friendships.

7. The Gatekeeper: Every office has a senior leader but every workplace has a gatekeeper who provides access to this top boss. Make an effort to “play nice” with the gatekeeper as he or she has the boss’ ear and the ability to make your life at work a smooth or rough process.

In life, we can all get by with a little help from our friends. The same is true when it comes to our careers. This week think about ways to enhance and expand your work and professional friendships. Remember, people are much more likely to recommend friends for promotions and new opportunities at other organizations - than people they don’t know.

August 10, 2016 Seven Things to Think About When It Comes to . . . the Do’s and Don’ts for Creating an Amazing Resume

Even though most people often get hired because of a personal contact or referral, you still need to have a great resume. Here are seven key do’s and don’ts to take your resume from ok to one that stands out in a crowd.

1. Size does matter: Your resume should use a 9 to 12 point font. Using anything larger or smaller makes it hard on the reader or seems like you are trying to make up for limited experience. Stick to fonts that are used in books, like Times New Roman, Helvetica, and Garamond, which will ensure that they are ideal for others to read.

2. Say it with color: Find ways to incorporate color into your resume to help you stand out. One way is to include a color logo of the companies that you have worked for. Adding logos is a simple and easy way to make your resume “pop” and differentiate it from the others in the pile.

3. Keep bullets to a minimum: For each section or job position include a maximum of 5 bullets. Any more than that will most likely not be read.

[] 4. Include examples and statistics: More than 50 percent of hiring managers say that they wish candidates would have included more examples and numbers to explain their previous work/accomplishments. Include the number of customers reached or the exact percentage growth of what you have helped create.

5. Avoid personal information: Don’t include your marital status, number of children, photo of yourself, or other personal details on your resume. A professional photo of yourself should appear on your LinkedIn profile. Also stay away from “cutesy” emails like 1hotmama@gmail.com, instead try to use your first and last name.@gmail.com

6. Manage the length: If you have less than four years of experience, the ideal resume should be one page and include approximately 400 words per page.

7. Take out filler words: Bullets are not meant to be complete prose sentences. Be sure to take out filler words like “a” and “the” and find the most concise way to list your work experience using tailored key words and action verbs like created, managed, coordinated, and developed.

This week, dust off your current resume by using these and other ways to make it engaging to the reader. Taking one hour to make simple yet important changes can make all the difference and enable you to stand in a meaningful way.

Seven Things When It Comes to Reflecting on the Past and Planning for the Future

Whether it’s a birthday, the date when you started your job or business, or even your marriage – anniversaries, are an ideal time to evaluate how far you’ve come, where you are, and where you want to be.

Last April, we launched our first interview with former TIME editor and head of editorial and partnerships at Flipboard, Josh Quittner. Over the past year, we’ve offered amazing conversations with many compelling personalities, fantastic feedback from fans and followers, and candid advice and resources to help people better navigate career choices and changes.

In celebration of The Living on Purpose Project’s one year anniversary, we’re sharing some of our favorite unconventional wisdom from our interviewees, as well as updates on what’s been keeping them busy since we last spoke to them.

1. Josh Quittner, Head of Editorial and Partnerships, Flipboard: “You need to ‘put your antenna up’ – that is, be receptive and start looking for new opportunities to get you to where you want to be. We don’t put our antennas up when things are good because there is no reason to. But the moment things aren’t going well you have to start looking and asking yourself what would I like to do now? And, what would I be good at now? Putting your antenna up means you’re looking, but also realizing that things will most likely not come in a familiar or expected form.” What Josh has been up to: I’ve been working with the China team at Flipboard and doing more international business development, which has stretched me a bit outside my “zone.” In my spare time, I’ve been working with some guys who are incarcerated at nearby San Quentin. They are trying to produce their first magazine. It’s a spin-off from the San Quentin News, one of the oldest newspapers in the prison system. The magazine will be called Wall City, and I can’t wait to see it. Follow Josh on Twitter at @twittner
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2. Tony Rocco, Middle School Teacher, Photographer, Educator and Executive Director of Photography Without Borders: “I was lost in high school. So I understand how difficult it can be to figure out what you want to do in life [at any age]. I tell people there’s no one way to do things. People will try to give you advice saying that you must do this, that, or the other thing. It can be confusing because no one really knows what’s expected [or required] to be successful … I had to stumble through life for a while until I figured things out.

Others continue to remind me that we need to give ourselves time to figure out our path and our purpose – in our own way and in our own time.” What Tony has been up to: Last summer I took four “Shutterbug” groups of students from Philadelphia to Columbia for our amazing cultural exchange program. One organization that we worked with, El Centro Colombo Americano in Medellin, has invited us back this year to replicate our program in four other major cities throughout Columbia. We will provide workshops that teach children how to tell stories with photography – spending two weeks in each city. Our program continues to be a huge success. Follow Tony on LinkedIn at /Tony Rocco
3. Stephanie Abrams, Co-Founder and CEO, Socialfly: “I went on many auditions but did not get every part. I learned that it’s okay if people say no because it means that something bigger and better was coming. It’s really helped me in my career because so much of my business is sales. People simply are not going to say yes all the time. I’ve learned not to take a “no” personally.” What Stephanie has been up to: I am excited to share that we released our first book, Like, Love, Follow. The Entreprenista’s Guide to Using Social Media to Grow Your Business. Our company continues to grow month over month and we have signed incredible new clients over the past year including Premio Foods, Canada Mark Diamonds & Cargo Cosmetics. Follow Stephanie on Twitter: @stephjillabrams and @socialfly

4. Sonia Sanchez, Poet, Mother, Professor, and National and International Lecturer on Black Culture and Literature, Women’s Liberation, Peace and Racial Justice: “Read everything, anything that is in print. Whether it’s related to your work, or life, or the business behind what you do – read it. Get a job that supports both your intentions of being a poet or novelist or whatever you want to be, but that also supports yourself and family. Make sure it’s a job you like that also, hopefully, gives you chances to do the things you really want. And, gather around supporters who will help encourage the way you live and who will respect the love that you feel for your art.” What Sonia has been up to: I have started a fellowship with the Schomburg Center in Harlem working with the national research library on a variety of efforts. I recently published SOS – Calling All Black People – A Black Arts Movement Reader, which includes works of fiction, poetry, and drama in addition to critical writings on issues of politics, aesthetics, and gender. And, last month the PBS World Channel premiered, “BaddDDD Sonia Sanchez” a documentary that includes readings and jazz-accompanied performances of my work. The documentary examines my contributions to the world of poetry, Black Arts Movement and leadership role in African American culture over the last half century. Follow Sonia on Twitter at @poetsanchez

5. Alex Faille, Associate Buyer at West Elm at Williams-Sonoma, Inc.: “Often we want to do what our peers are striving for and doing. Luckily the friends around me were on focused career paths. The people you hang around should be pulling you up. The worst possible thing to do working in this city is to forget that having a job here is a blessing. I feel like there are too many people who feel like they’re ‘owed.’ Those people don’t last long in this town. When you remember that you are blessed to work at what you love/want to pursue, you will work harder because you know there are lots of people waiting for your spot. Even though I like comfort, I have learned that the smoothest course isn’t always the best path.” What Alex has been up to: I am continuing my career in merchandising/buying with West Elm and enjoying life in Brooklyn! I’ve spent the most time this past year being inspired by health, fitness, food, dating, and travel. 2015 was a “yes” year where I tried to say “yes” to most things that came my way. I had WAY too much fun, but plan to do the same for 2016. Follow Alex on Instagram at @afaille

6. Courtney Spritzer, Co-Founder and COO, Socialfly: “The last thing, and probably the most important, is to always remember that the things you do on social media are public, so you want to make sure you’re always putting your best foot forward. When you are looking for a job, people will absolutely Google you. If they find something unprofessional it could kill your chance of landing that dream job. Everyone should be mindful about what you put out there. Posting a picture or a comment could harm you in ways you don’t realize. Be active but be professionally savvy and aware when it comes to social media.” What Courtney has been up to: Launched my first book “Like. Love. Follow,” which has been very successful in helping us land new clients and brand ourselves within the social media industry. Currently, I am working on scaling the business, hiring new talent, and securing larger accounts/clients. Follow Courtney on Instagram at @courtspritzer

7. Katie Retelle, Educator and Mother: “I became an “expert” observer and asker of questions. I started looking to people who are where they wanted to be in life. Some I knew - others I didn’t. I learned how they accomplished what they did, and used that information as a strategy to “plan” out my own life and to stay aware of the excuses/fears that might hold me back.” What Katie has been up to: Now that spring has finally arrived, I’m looking forward to fun outdoor activities with the kids. I continue to be a full-time mom, and also work with a medical startup, part-time. I also just started a new opportunity – teaching at a bilingual preschool in Riverdale, full-time. My two-year-old daughter, Ella, comes to work with me, which benefits us both. She will be immersed in Spanish, expanding social and cognitive skills. The best part is that I will still be with her and can ease back into my career-related arena. Follow Katie Retelle on Facebook at /Katie.Retelle

This week, use this opportunity to take a peek at or re-read one of these amazing conversations. Or, just take a moment to digest these words of wisdom and think of ways it can help you advance in your career readiness.

Seven Life Lessons and Career Advice from Judith Germano, Founding Member of GermanoLawLLC and Former Federal Prosecutor and Chief of Economic Crimes at the U.S. Attorney’s Office, District of New Jersey

1. Step away from something in order to focus much more intensely on it: Sometimes on my long runs, I come up with really valuable business ideas and solutions that might have taken me longer to reach just sitting at the desk. Stepping away from an issue or problem and looking at it from a different angle is useful. I think it also makes us happier, healthier and more efficient people.

2. Feel confident in trusting your instincts to take the right next step: Start by asking yourself “what’s the right thing is to do?” Then determine who you might need to ask for guidance or advice on a variety of options. You have to work on finding the balance between trusting your instincts, having good judgment and seeking help when and as needed.

3. Success comes from personal initiative and hard work: I have had many wonderful mentors who have guided and advocated for me, and for that I feel very blessed but, as my parents always taught me, success starts from initiative and hard work.

[] 4. Be a forward-looking person, but have flexibility: I have a map, or plan, in my head but often have ended up taking a different course. I’m all the better for it. It’s that flexibility, openness, and looking at what’s ahead that helps me most.

5. Hear contrary opinions to help you, even if you decide to go/do it another way: I think it’s important to keep an open-mind to all kinds of advice, the positive and the more critical. Sometimes the advice that is the hardest to hear could be the kind that we need the most.

6. Find balance and do not succumb to self-doubt. Take time for careful introspection. Make sure there’s the right balance of confidence and humility in each step you take.

7. Find a process to determine what’s the “right” or best thing in any situation. Working for 11 years as a federal prosecutor, I learned to exercise this on a regular basis. But I think it can help anyone, in many situations: ask yourself if “it’s” ethically sound, legally consistent, strategically appropriate, and best for the interested parties. Remember sometimes it’s best to be aggressive.

Other times it’s right to step back with confidence, wait and then engage when it’s appropriate. And sometimes the best thing to do is to not engage at all, even when it may be tempting and when quiet restraint takes more strength and courage than action.

Everyone needs an advice career “dream team.” Today gather a group of friends, family mentors and even strangers who always offer a positive and important perspective and great pearls of wisdom.

Seven things to think about when it comes to what to do while you wait . . .

Happy New Year!

Whether you are starting 2016 unemployed, underemployed or simply pondering something better, each of us can use some enhanced patience and perseverance. Change, especially the kind related to our careers, doesn’t happen overnight. Here are some inspiring stories of people who creatively maximized their ‘wait time.’ It might just be the thing you need to turn lemons into lemonade and develop or discover your next opportunity.

Kat Cole, President and COO of Cinnabon Working towards to success with a strong work ethic What she did to pay the bills:

Kat began her career as a Hooters waitress in Jacksonville, FL. During her first year of waitressing, she learned every aspect of the restaurant biz.

Her creative grind/hustle:

Kat’s managers rewarded her enthusiasm and strong work ethic by sending her to a training program at headquarters. She dropped out of college to travel the world training employees and became a Vice President by age 26. Seven years later Kat left Hooters to become COO of Cinnabon in 2011. (Kat eventually returned to complete her education and receive her MBA in 2010 from Georgia State).

Jennifer Hudson, Award Winning Singer/Actor You don’t have to finish first to make it big – just be open and take risks What she did to pay the bills:

After working at Burger King in her late teens, Jennifer spent time working far from home. Jennifer worked as a singer aboard Disney Cruise Lines before landing a spot on the third season of American Idol.

Her creative grind/hustle:

Jennifer made it to the top 7 (contestants) before she was voted off the show. She continued to pursue her dream of being a singer/actress and took on the role of Effie White in Dreamgirls (2006), which won her an Oscar and Golden Globe. Two years later, she was awarded a Grammy for her debut album released in 2008. Jennifer remains one of the most successful former American Idols, to date.

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Actor and Former Professional Wrestler Ignore the experts’ advice What he did to pay the bills:

After an injury caused his football career to fumble, Dwayne turned to the family business (wrestling) as his plan B.

His creative grind/hustle:

After becoming “Rocky” the wrestler ignored the advice, and even demands, of those in charge to be the “good guy.” Instead he created his self-confident alter ego and ‘The Rock’ – an A-list superstar wrestler, actor and producer was born.

George Lopez, Comedian and Actor Pay your dues and keep laughing all the way to the bank What he did to pay the bills:

Before pursuing a comedy career, George worked an entry-level job manufacturing airplane parts. Years later he landed his first stand-up gig at a Las Vegas casino.

His creative grind/hustle:

George spent 20 years as a virtually “unknown” comic in the standup circuit before being asked to host a morning radio show in LA, which opened up his path to stardom.

J.K. Rowling Bestselling Author The unstoppable power of real talent and creativity What she did to pay the bills:

J.K. was a divorced, single mother who she says, “was as poor as possible without being homeless” when she began writing the famously popular Harry Potter series on a train napkin.

Her creative grind/hustle:

Her first book, Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone was rejected by 12 publishers. Lucky 13 came about because of a publishing exec’s eight-year-old daughter who read one chapter of the book and begged for more. Today the Harry Potter brand is worth $15 billion and Rowling’s books have been translated into 70 languages.

Sheryl Crow, Musician/Singer Even when you get a break – you may have to wait for an even “bigger” one What she did to pay the bills:

After graduating from college, Sheryl worked as a school music teacher – freeing her up to perform on nights and weekends. Later, she was given the opportunity to write commercial jingles for McDonalds and Toyota and even sing background vocals for Michael Jackson’s 80’s Bad World Tour.

Her creative grind/hustle:

In 1992, her original debut album was dubbed “unfit” for release by label execs. She was forced to go back to the drawing board and one year later became a household name when “All I Wanna Do” became a surprise hit.

Colonel Sanders, Entrepreneur, Kentucky Fried Chicken/Franchise Creator Forget age and even money, persistence is the secret recipe for success What he did to pay the bills:

At 65 years old, Harland Sanders was broke, owned a small house and a beat up car, and had just received his first social security check of $99.

His creative grind/hustle:

Sanders used the only thing he did have – an idea. He traveled throughout the south trying to convince restaurant owners to use his popular chicken recipe in return for a small percentage of the sales. He received 1009 rejections before finding the 1010th person to help fund his dream. The Colonel proves that it doesn’t matter how many “no’s” we receive, as long as we get the one and only “yes” that counts.

Everyone needs time to nurture and cultivate their dream. This week, read these and other inspirational stories of people who found innovative ways to make the most of their talents and time waiting for something better. Remember your “big break” is out there if you are persistent, and have perseverance and patience to uncover it.

Seven Simple Steps When It Comes to Setting Realistic Goals.

The things we think and say to ourselves have the greatest power to extend (or limit) our individual goals and expectations. When it comes to goal setting, what matters is positive thinking and that a goal is attainable and realistic from your perspective. Here are some great guidelines to help ensure that your professional goals are strategic and supported by realistic tactics that will help you achieve success.

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1. Assess how each goal fits into your overall career/life plan: Before setting a goal, you should first be clear about your overall professional plan. Simply knowing that you want to work for yourself in two years can be huge in helping you determine if an idea is “goal worthy.” Spend time and effort on goals that are stepping-stones to the place you ultimately want to be.

2. Change your thoughts: The most difficult part of my job as a career counselor is helping others to change how they think -and what they believe- about themselves. I often meet clients when they have just been or are about to be laid off; or when they are so depressed about their current situation that it actually prevents and limits their future possibilities. One of the first things I ask of new clients is to identify three habits that they need to “break” in order to erase negative energy and create more positive thinking. For some people it’s not sharing their plans for change (at least right away) with pessimistic, naysayer friends and family members. For others, it’s making a conscious choice to avoid making “rushed” decisions out of desperation and fear.

3. Be practical about how long change may take: You have to be realistic about not only what you want to do, but also about how long it will take for you to do it. This includes small things like the time it actually takes to write a new cover letter and update your resume, to the response time of potential employers who will review them. Remember, it probably took you years to get to this “place” that you don’t want to be anymore; and therefore it will most likely take several weeks if not months to get you out of it.

4. Maximize your marketable skills: One of the biggest mistakes people make in career transition is refusing to do the easiest and most practical thing that enables them to pays the bills and save money for their new career path or venture. You may say, “I hate (fill-in-the-blank) and I don’t want to ever do it again.” However, if you have spent the last five years helping your family launch three new restaurants – managing every detail from the scouting the locations to hiring staff to planning promotional efforts- then that’s what you should keep doing while you flush out your plan to pursue your dream job. It really doesn’t matter that restaurant consulting is not what you went to school for or what you want to do long-term. Use the most marketable experience you have (as an employee or consultant) for next six months to a year, to get both the money and flexibility to create a smoother transition into what you really want to do.

5. Have a darn good back up plan: Change is never smooth and it often involves two steps forward and one step back. For every goal you create, you should also develop a back-up plan simultaneously. Having your “Plan B” already in place will keep you on track and one step ahead when, not if, things don’t go as planned. Be specific. For example, know exactly what you need to start doing four weeks before unemployment runs out and you haven’t found another job; or have the specific dates of when companies will start accepting seasonal or holiday staff applications in order to fill the hole in left in your pocket by your part-time job.

6. Don’t let history repeat itself: We all are creatures of habit and tend to approach and do things the same way, even when trying to create change. In order to prevent making the same mistakes, take time to identify and examine the big things in your personal or professional life that did not go as planned. Don’t think of it as a failure, rather some huge life lessons you’d prefer not to repeat again. Then develop a 7-point plan that addresses what you could have done differently and ways to prevent you from doing the same or similar things.

7. Find an accountability partner: Setting a major goal is one thing, meeting every milestone that will lead you to accomplish that goal is another. Develop a detailed list of the key milestones for every goal, including target deadlines for each milestone. Give a copy to a friend and ask that they call or email you a week before each deadline to request a written status update. Sometimes simply knowing that you have to report another person gives you the extra motivation to push a little bit harder and get things done.

This week, examine three things that you “say” to yourself and make those thoughts more positive. Once armed with an enhanced level of positive thinking, try one of these seven suggestions to create a new professional goal that you can successfully accomplish.